4.

Oh jeah. Again it was long ago that I wrote in my blog.
The summer went away fast. Now I go to school every day, and I'm always tired. But no problem.It will be good...
About in june I talked with Andy, and she said to me, that my big love will come in summer.I was waiting him, and he didn't come, and I'm sad, because I don't know that i would ever had a boyfriend, a husband, a family...I'm alone, and I hate it.And everybody says; Réka you are pretty, you aren't chubby, you are kind, and not ugly, and so on...But I really can't belive it, because if it's true, I should'nt be alone...So fuck... I'm just waiting, and become sadder because nobody comes,especially my love.
I feel myself Looser, a BIG LOOSER.
Sometimes it's so bad when I saw a lot of lovers, and I look them enviously.
I know that in the world a lot of people has bigger problem, than my love problem, just it's not good. There are a lot of girls, who I think uglier,than me, and even so they have boyfriends.because they have self-confidence, and I don't have. It's a very big problem...I wrote down that to Bácskai, and I want to talk with her about it as occasions offer, but so far haven't offered yet...and maybe never will have offered...Fuck!
Wretch that I am!